Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
