butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
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