If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
