how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
