thus making me awesome and them whores
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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