I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Life is so much better after having sex.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
