have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
you never un-have a 4some
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize