like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Are we still banned from the library?
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
