It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I am spending my child support on dildos
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?