The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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