My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
