i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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