Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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