that's an acceptable place to lick
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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