New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Randomize
