Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
You're like the curious george of whores
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
