Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
