idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
bring money and cleavage
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
