I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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