O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
