Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
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