She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
