i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
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