Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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