Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Randomize