with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
