apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
