sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
