people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
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theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
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Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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