Texts From Last Night

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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying

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  (773): I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying http://tfl.nu/t0mj
  Replies (1) Good night (1005) Bad night (1041)
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  (650): View more from California

  Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.

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  (650): Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points. http://tfl.nu/731b
  Replies (5) Good night (1610) Bad night (452)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Pregnant stripper...not hot.

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  (734): Pregnant stripper...not hot. http://tfl.nu/9fe2
  Replies (20) Good night (615) Bad night (1558)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?

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  (616): Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma? http://tfl.nu/rtd3
  Replies (4) Good night (499) Bad night (2465)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.

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  (904): Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine. http://tfl.nu/7xom
  Replies (50) Good night (4074) Bad night (683)
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  (562): View more from California

  Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.

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  (562): Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty. http://tfl.nu/kgia
  Replies (34) Good night (11790) Bad night (1431)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.

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  (304): His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know. http://tfl.nu/hifx
  Replies (13) Good night (3779) Bad night (584)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome

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  (816): we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome http://tfl.nu/vmah
  Replies (77) Good night (6174) Bad night (1990)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase

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  (770): We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase http://tfl.nu/nkt0
  Replies (0) Good night (677) Bad night (2550)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE

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  (407): SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE http://tfl.nu/zlef
  Replies (8) Good night (2036) Bad night (573)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in

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  (208): He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in http://tfl.nu/d89r
  Replies (10) Good night (3107) Bad night (738)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window

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  (954): I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window http://tfl.nu/x5q3
  Replies (4) Good night (858) Bad night (373)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.

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  (440): My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b. http://tfl.nu/x8nr
  Replies (6) Good night (625) Bad night (486)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar

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  (817): i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar http://tfl.nu/a2fz
  Replies (1) Good night (645) Bad night (242)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.

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  (916): Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is. http://tfl.nu/njx1
  Replies (2) Good night (736) Bad night (155)

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