My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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