Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
