When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
he high fived his dick after we had sex
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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