it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
my being single is dangerous.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Randomize
