I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
