bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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