it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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