ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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