I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
zippers are such a cool invention
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
