it was like his penis was on wheels.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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