Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
