The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize