ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize