I heard we made out
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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