how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
i just sent this text using only my big toe
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
