How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
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