my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.