can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
