I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize