It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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