Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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