So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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